So like Im in jail ya'know...
This time though I didn't do what they thought I done... Honest.
I mean those other times sure!
You know I totally shout out when they ask who done it all. I mean I like the cred for the shit I pull, and its not like I can be busted for it.
Man, when I break in its because I know them shit's in the suits are guilty. All I do - is get the info, and pass it on. Sure, its hacking... but when the shit hits the fan I'm like instantly the one the reporters come by too see if the shits legit... or if its as fake as it smells foul.
So then I'm like on CNN and shit. And when the cops come, instead of "Evil hacker" I'm a Cyber-Vigilante... Who exposed the evil corporation. Sure the media spins things the way that profits, but I can spin the spin right- round baby... yes?
Show the people how bad those rich fuckers really are. Show the dumb fuckin-red-neck christian-white bread-mid-western voters... what they send their hard earned sweat off the land to Washington for.
So heres this fuck. Elected official yes? Got out and met the people to get elected. Shook Billy Bo Bobs uncles hand, and kissed his baby. Took millions in donations, and then gets a seat in congress. Everyone thinks he is the hardest working man on the hill.. Good guy, nice looking kids. His wife is just the right mix of socker mom and pitbull.
Any rate I smell the shit on him. Talk to a few people who work the nets like I do.
We know there is chum in the water but no one else has spotted the bucket of fish heads yet.
So I go in for the kill anyway. Its all there in his aluminium boat... His hard drive is full of kiddie porn, some of which is obviously made by Washingtons most influential reverend... You know the guy, has his own city, they call it a TV network, and in his town he is sherrif, judge, and eternal damnation all in one seat. The guy is like totally doing it to one of his chuberic angels who regularly assist him with his work for God... If thats what their calling it these days.
So Here comes CNN, or MSNBC... or like Huffington post if the story is really hard hitting.... and like I'm still waiting for John Stewart to call.
But then out of left feild, like im Hackin into this sweet mainframe. Its a large corp, did some major damage to the enviro, and like theres whimpers from the bunny petting community, and the tree huggers union... and them lot that complains but never actually does shit, and then complains some more about how no one listens to their complaints and do shit for them, so they don't actually have to do anything but can sit at home in their mothers basement where they have their base of complaining operations center set up on their sisters borrowed laptop...
You know the people I mean. Smoking shit but it isn't making them any smarter YO!
Anyway so Ive got my head and shoulders in tight to this hot wet mainframe right? And all of a sudden a defense department firewall screen pops up on my deck, and the feds knock the fuckin door in, and cuff my cuticles behind my ears and drag me into THIS funny farm, only... when I'm innocent this shit ain't so funny yes?
Authors note- Its late, I cant sleep and this came to me in a flash and in my insomiac state I had to write it out. Ill be adding to this story soon and adding pictures though I didn't have a pic in mind when I wrote this.
Hope you like it, post feedback if you do, and definately post critiques I love flames even.